Of Death... And Doctors

How does it feel to be a doctor?
How does it feel to be woken up with the words 'Doctor, there's an emergency?'
How does it feel to hear the sound of ambulance sirens slicing through the air as they bring yet another mangled body to the casualty/emergency ward?
How does it feel to look at so much blood seeping out from a human body?
How does it feel to hold a knife(or do they call it a scapel? Whatever!) and cut someone up in the name of operation?
How does it feel to watch a soul slip into unconsciousness?
How does it feel to bear the news of death to the family waiting outside?
How does it feel to utter those words 'I'm sorry he couldn't make it', 'we tried our best, please take heart'.
How does it feel to hear the crying and wailing at the news of death?
How does it feel to be a doctor?

These questions and more keep bombarding my consciousness as I stand in the accident/emergency words of Federal Medical Centre, watching as it were, a movie of life being played out.

I've been here less than 3 hours and I cant stand it anymore. But, I'm wondering,

How does it feel to watch this movie everyday? Or more, to be a part of it?
Yet, this is someone, yes, a doctor's 'NORMAL' day!

My thoughts may seem wild and uncoordinated, that's how I feel at the moment and that's how I'm baring it to the world!

Kaylese-Smyles Emele
Federal Medical Centre, Abakaliki
31st January, 2011